The importance of naps
Kate is a fussy pants. She’s not a colicky baby, she doesn’t scream non-stop for hours. She fusses. Constantly. This morning was incredibly frustrating because, first of all, she kept waking up in the middle of naps. I tried like 3 different times in 3 different ways and each time she would fall asleep great, like usual, and about an hour into it she’d wake up crying for one reason or another. An hour may be good for some babies, but not mine – mine likes her long naps. Mine needs her long naps.
So then she’d be crying to start and I’d go through the usual: feed her, burp her, change her. And that would good for all of 2 minutes. Playmat? Wah. Swing? Waahhh. Pack’n’play? Waahh! Walking around? Walking outside? Sitting on my lap? Waaaaahhhhh!! Oh. My. God. Child, what do you WANT? And of course she escalates, so the little fussing turns into crying and once she gets into being pissed off I honestly think she forgets why she’s upset in the first place. And still, I don’t know what the problem is.
As far as I can figure her awake time can withstand only nursing and then maybe 10 minutes of happy time. Once those 10 minutes are up I have no idea what to do other than get her to sleep more (which is usually pretty easy to do, just not today). I can think of many different things I could do with her – if she would even entertain the thought. Some days I feel like I must be doing something wrong, especially when others talk about how their babies enjoy spending time doing things, how awake and interested in the world they are. Other days I’m convinced that she’s just extremely picky and this is just how she is.
So most of the time she just sleeps. Except today when she kept waking up. She had a long screaming fit mid-day simply due to lack of sleep. But I tell you what, once we got her to sleep after that, man, she was OUT. On Den’s chest she wiggled and nuzzled and then lights out. She slept for over 3 hours, ate, was changed, then slept for another 3 hours. And she’s still asleep. Errr, I hope she sleeps tonight, too.
So lesson of the day: only attempt one nap somewhere not in our arms. She just doesn’t sleep well enough unless she’s snuggled up to her daddy or me.
I hope the days where she is crabby are few and far between. It’s ever changing with a newborn.
It is good though that sleep begets sleep in infants so her long naps during the day should bode well for restful nights.
You guys are doing great!
Its very hard to entertain a baby.One of the reasons I dont like the NB stage is because of that.
I used to try all different kinds of things,but of course,nothing worked for very long.I had mobiles with lights (instead of music),black and white mobiles and toys (because they say that babies cant see colours until about 3 months old),walking around,baby massages etc
But in all honesty,there is only so much you can do before the desesperation sets in lol.
I think we spent the first few months just passing our kids around and going out a whole lot (mainly just to clear our heads-not exactly to entertain our kids lol).
I found that the only thing that kept my kids quiet for longer periods of time (whilst inside the house) was the TV.
Yes,I know..bad right? But one has to shower,eat and get stuff done,and DH isnt always around to help.I love being a mother and all,but sometimes I did actually *need* an exuse to just do my own thing for a bit (I still do)..weather it was to do laundry or wash dishes etc.I *needed* those mini vacations lol.
I downloaded a bunch of VERY colourful kids shows (teletubbies,tweenies etc etc) and Id push the kids bouncy chair closer to the TV so that they could watch it.
It worked.Sometimes they´d even fall asleep.
Id do it when I was alone and couldent pass baby to someone else kwim?
Once they get older (like 6 months +),its different.They enjoy interaction and exploring their surroundings,they dont need to be held so much etc
Its then when you can use a walker/exersaucer etc and they just explore their surroundings on their own.
Its so much better then.
Babies are just difficult lol.
Is it too hot to go for a walk? With Julia (now five months), when she got to that screamy stage I would plop her in the stroller and head out. We walked all over town. The change of scene did her good; she’d usually stop yelling 20 feet into the walk.
A nice ride in the car used to help…at least Kate will sleep an hour for a nap…mine would do 20-30 minute stints, which makes for a cranky baby (and mommy). It does all pass and soon Kate will be on a more regular schedule, and find fun things to do when she is awake. My son also liked music when he was fussy…it helped a bit. I would also hold him with his tummy in the crook of my arm and walked with him, he liked this “football” hold and it seemed to calm him. Also, a friend of mine would tie a helium balloon to her sons wrist at that age and he would love to watch it move as he moved…it really kept him entertained for a long time (I never tried this, as there was never any time to actually go get a helium balloon, but it may be worth a try). Good luck…she is such a cutie, even if she is a fussy pants!
Natalie, I have a 19 month old and everyone (friends, relatives, co-workers) I’ve ever talked to has gone through the exact same thing with their baby at the same age.
It’s totally normal and completely common. They fuss, and you don’t know why. It’ frustrating and you want to fix it. It’s no fun, but I promise, it’s just a phase. She will grow out of it in a few weeks and the fussiness will be a thing of the past (well, for the most part anyway!) :)
In the meantime, just keep doing what you’re doing…it sounds like you guys are doing a great job!
unfortunately, a normal infant sleep cycle is 50 minutes. when you are holding her or have her in a sling, she still arouses. but being near you comforts her back to sleep. you probably notice her breathing changes, noises escape, eyes flutter, etc. i got around this in the daytime by laying mine on her tummy on the oouch near me with her head turned to the side. when she aroused, i made sure to re-insert her paci quickly (otherwise she was sure to wake fully) and patted her lightly on the back until she fell back into a calmer sleep. it would buy me another sleep cycle, sometimes two. particularly on their tummies..they just fall into a deeper sleep. right now kate is too young to know how to soothe herself back to sleep..she needs help from you. i think some babies can actually do this on their own or do it better than others, and some can’t. nothing to do with their moms, just their personalities. the sleep stuff is the hardest part. hang in there.
Fiddle1 – That makes so much sense! I’ve been noticing that, that she arouses, but I didn’t know it was a 50 minute sleep cycle. That explains why she sleeps an hour in her cosleeper before crying for me. And I’ve noticed that on her belly she’s better able to soothe herself, yes.
I just want to reassure you, you are doing nothing wrong. Newborns, they are a tricky bunch!! This too shall pass, this too shall pass. I would say (based on my limited experience of one baby) that by 6 months you will have a fat happy interactive charmer….it is not you, it is the newborn stage. Gah, the newborn stage is very hard!!