I wanted to spoil myself a little bit and had an hour to waste before my massage, so before I left I tried putting on nail polish. Didn’t work. I kept screwing it up and my clear topcoat apparently needs to be replaced. I ended up calling up the spa and asking if they had a manicure appointment available. Hmph.

The massage was interesting, and she did more than I anticipated with the chakra massage. In addition to the guided meditation she massaged my back, neck, feet and arms. I really concentrated on just letting go of all thoughts and just being present, enjoying it. I visualized light glowing in my ovaries, healing energy nourishing them. On the other hand I wished she would have worked my back more. The other thing about the chakra massage was that it seemed a little too… packaged. There were 7 cards for the 7 chakras, each one with a specific scented oil. I guess the thing that got me was that it was produced by Aveda, the company/product that supplies most of the products for this spa. And I just couldn’t help wondering, this big corporation, how likely is it that this is something more than just a sales pitch to them? It looks cute and new-agey, but do they really actually buy into it? I highly doubt it. I don’t mind toeing over the line into new age type stuff, but I want someone who really really believes in what they do. I want the genuine article, not what someone at corporate thinks will sell.

Then I had my manicure. First I’ll say that I’ve had a manicure before at one of those cheap places in the mall, and this was definitely better. She was very good with my nails, getting everything filed down just right, buffing it all up, using oil. And then she gave me a hand and arm massage. OMG! To be honest, I think that was just as good as the full body massage! She really worked the muscles, which felt absolutely heavenly. My poor hands are overworked.

And then we looked over and realized it was POURING. I mean heavens opened up and dropped everything. I was hoping it would ease up quickly, but no such luck. After I paid it was still raining hard. I walked around the building to my car, and that’s when I let loose a bad word as I realized I left my sunroof open. Again. It had rained this morning but then cleared up, still warm and muggy… I left it open to air out my car so it wouldn’t be 100 degrees when I drove home. Yeah. So instead I got to drive home sitting in a puddle. And then when I pulled into my driveway and pushed the button to release my seatbelt the metal buckle snapped up and took a gouge out of my freshly painted thumbnail. Oh I was pissed. I managed to press it down and rub it in so now it’s just a minor mark instead of a huge hole, but still. So much for being relaxed and refreshed after my day. Instead I walked in the house with a wet ass and chipped nail. (So I changed, turned on my meditation music, and took a nap. Screw this shit, I AM going to have a peaceful day.)

So now I’m on the search for a new massage therapist to try. Today – like other spa massages I’ve had – was nice, but I think I’m looking for something more. I’m going to have to start looking beyond the spa… I feel like what I need is a therapeutic massage, something geared more towards physical ailments and healing than an hour at the spa. Problem is I type “massage” into google and get over 20 local results. I know there’s a masseuse at the center where my acupuncturist is – I actually just received a coupon. So I’m debating. I don’t know how else to find the right one. I wish someone could refer me to someone local, but no one I know around here can afford stuff like that, and reviews online are few and far between (not that I’m sure I actually trust any of them). I don’t have the money to try 10 different massages – as much as I’d like to.

I think I’ve been spoiled. When I go to my chiropractor I feel like she has a magic touch, even though she only spends a few minutes with me. She knows exactly what she’s doing, she can zero right in on where it hurts, and it feels just beautiful. I also love her as a person, she and I chat and catch up. I want that kind of relationship with all of my care providers. I don’t think my connection with my acupuncturist is exactly what I want, and if I do another IVF I might try someone else. But, I still really love my treatments there. I told Den today that if I had $65 to spend on myself I’d probably chose to do an acupuncture session than today’s massage. Not that the massage wasn’t lovely, but there’s something about my acupuncture meditation that just clicks right inside me.

::

Meanwhile, second injection is done… this one stung a little bit, but not too bad. I have a bruise from last night’s injection, but it’s pretty small. I have the nerves that I always get at the start of stimming… “how can this little bit of liquid actually be doing anything at all?” You don’t feel anything for the first week-ish. I go in Wednesday for my first follicle check and am willing to bet there will be a bunch of them. Please send me no overstimming vibes… that’s my biggest worry right now. I’m on the same dose as last stims, so it should be okay. (But then there are never any guarantees.)

It’s hard to believe that in a little over one week I’ll be triggering. Just crazy.