I have lost more weight. I don’t make a regular habit of it anymore, since I don’t expect the number to change, but the other morning I stepped on the scale… and nearly fell off as the digital display flashed 134 at me. Umm… whoa. The last time I weighed as low as 135 was the beginning of February 2006 (less than two months later I had passed 140, and it never went back down). I still think 135 is more than I ought to be if I were “fit” – but I’m not, and I’m pretty damn psyched to be here.

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I don’t think I’m going to do the allergy shots. I’d probably do them, if nothing else were at stake, but I keep thinking about the pregnancy. Is right before I get pregnant a good time to start that sort of thing? Do I really want to be trying to fit more weekly appointments into my already jam-packed schedule? Plus from the sounds of it anti-allergy medication is safe during pregnancy, and between that and modifying my environment I’m doing fine. I will say that the one thing that really makes me want to do the shots is the knowledge that if I decide to do them at a later time – say a year or two from now – I’d have to do that horrific allergy test again… and that is not something I want to do.

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Two days left of my birth control pills. I am so nervous about all of this. If my period takes too long to come we’ll miss the clinic’s cut-off start date. If my period come too early insurance might not be approved yet. I’m trying not to think too hard about it, and I’ve been staring at the calendars for IVF#1 and IVF#2… both times my period took 5 days to show. So that’s what I am banking on. This timeline is making me emotionally nauseated. I have spotted on and off this cycle on the pill and every time it happens I start panicking thinking that AF is coming and everything’s going to hell. (I am VERY careful to not miss or be late with any pills. Yes, my body has done that in the past – though not with an IVF cycle. It’s sensitive to the hormones.)

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I have been getting hellacious foot cramps lately. I’m pretty sure it’s because of the heels I’m wearing to work, so I’m taking care to rotate shoes – some flats, some short heels, sometimes my cute big heels that look so great). My feet do not hurt during the day at all – I even spend most of my day sitting. But after I get home, kick off my shoes, eat dinner and curl up on the couch or in bed, that’s when it hits me. This evening Den was rubbing my foot trying to get it to loosen up and I was whimpering in pain like I was doing during labor. It HURT. A hot water foot bath seems to be the only thing that really gets it to really go away at that point – I can get them to ease up by standing and flexing and rubbing and pressing, but as soon as I let up it hits again. Not so fun.

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One very unpleasant side-effect of cycling in the winter (that I was not really prepared for): icing my stomach for shots? EFFING COLD. We keep our house at 65 to start with, and my blood runs cold anyways. So for the few minutes I spend sitting with my shirt lifted, ice pack pressed to my belly, my teeth are chattering. I’m starting to think just doing it without the ice would be better.

I think I need to start taking an iron suppliment. I know last time I was told that my iron levels were low at the start of pregnancy, and I bet they’re low again. I wonder if that’s part of the reason I’m always so damn cold.