The day at mother-in-law’s went well enough. The people there are always so nice, I know them from previous years, and Den’s known them since childhood. I did end up bringing my knitting along – and ended up finishing it. Den was originally very unhappy to learn that I’d brought my knitting with me. I think he invisioned me sitting in a corner, hunched over my knitting and actively ignoring everyone. Instead what happened was I sat on the deck with everyone else, knitting and talking at the same time. The knitting prevented me from continuously eating and thus feeling sick at the end of the day. I call that a success.

However I made one major oversight. I didn’t really think about the fact that I was knitting a baby hat pattern… or that people might innocently inquire as to what I am making. So that was… not good. I had to explain about 5 times to 5 different ladies that I’m knitting a baby hat, and no it’s not for me, no I don’t have any news to share. Luckily they all dropped it at that – like I said, they’re very nice people – but I felt like an idiot for putting myself in that position!

An old friend of mine got me to join facebook today. I looked around at my graduating class and I did recognize quite a few names. Unfortunately there were more than a couple of them that had photos of either themselves pregnant or them with a baby/kid. And you know, I really didn’t need to see that today. I know it’s a gross overstatement to think that everyone in the world is having babies but me, but at that moment it sure felt like it. Especially when it involved the people from the crowds that I did not hang out with in highschool… yet again I am not allowed to be a part of a club. Overreaction? Sure. I know that. Doesn’t stop my heart from thudding into my chest and my mouth from getting dry as I fight past the frustration and anger, though.

I added some friends to my account on facebook (and tried to ignore that graduating class), and notied that one of my friends had joined a Cause for Breast Cancer. And I thought hmmm, wonder if there’s a cause for infertility. There wasn’t. And I just couldn’t let that be… so I made one. I feel really weird being the creator of it, but I’m not just going to sit back and wait for someone else to do it. So if you feel like it and have a facebook account, do a search for infertility and join the cause. (And let me know if anything I wrote sounds idiotic and should be changed. It is after midnight, after all.)

If I can’t have a baby, at least I can have a cause to champion. Though I know Den really really wishes I weren’t quite so… passionate about my causes.