Parenting Philosophies
I do feel a little lighter today. Even though AF is right around the corner (still not here yet, but still spotting) I am not upset about it. I am looking forward – and knowing that for the next several months we don’t have to worry about any of it. It’s kind of a relief.
Anyways I’m blog surfing and came across Surviving My Loss and her parenting philosophies. I thought I’d write a little bit about mine.
Sleeping – my thoughts on this have changed over the past year and a bit. Initially I always figured the baby would be in a crib in the baby’s room. I was a little puzzled at Den’s insistence that we have the baby in our room. But after thinking about it for so long I’ve come to agree with him. I really doubt we’ll have the baby sleep in our bed due to the dogs (and the fact that my husband is a heavy sleeper and likes to spread out). He wants a co-sleeper. I just want the baby close by.
Feeding – Breastfeeding, absolutely, unless something really prevents that. I even feel so strongly that I’d go off my meds if it turns out the celexa will affect the baby through my breastmilk, but we’ll see how that goes.
Diapers – I’ve always just assumed I’d do disposable diapers, but recently the idea of doing cloth diapers and being eco-concious really appeals to me. However, we’d have to get a diaper service because there’s no way I’m washing diapers on top of everything else I can’t keep up with. (Den feels fine with either decision.)
Circumcision – I’ve mentioned this one before – I feel VERY strongly against it. However my husband is the opposite. I am really really not looking forward to the explosive arguments that will ensue.
Vaccines – My thoughts are very similar to how I feel about vaccines with my pets: Some vaccines are very good things. Some seem to have more side-effects than they have benefits. So I really doubt I’ll be following the typical schedule, and I won’t be giving 6 vaccines at once to my young child. Probably a delayed vacc schedule with some vaccines not given.
Baby wearing – Absolutely! Den and I both look forward to that. :D
SAH v. WHO – Stay at home. I’ve always wanted to be home with my kids. I may or may not continue working part-time at the cat shelter after the baby’s born… I have a feeling I may need some breaks! And since it’s flexible I can arrange to go in on weekends when Den’s home or such.
TV – I have no big objections to it. I tend to zone out to TV way too often myself. I think Baby Einstein stuff looks really good for babies! However, no Barney will be allowed in my house.
First off, thank you for not being one of those moms who thinks I’m the worst mom ever because of the stuff I’m doing differently and tries to make me feel like dirt at every turn. *hugs*
And second – and more importantly – thank you for banning Barney!!!
Oh, and as soon as you get pregnant, start looking for a pediatrician. I know some women who waited until mid- to late-pregnancy and wanted delayed or no vaccinations, and they had the worst time finding a ped that would accept them because of it :( It’s amazing how rigid some doctors can be about what really is a parental decision.
LOL I have strong feelings about Barney!! :P
I was just telling Den tonight – I do want to do some things in a specific way for me, but who am I to judge what works for another family? I just can’t really comprehend that. As long as it’s not harmful – and things like bottle feeding or being in daycare certainly aren’t harmful in my eyes, just different from what I want to do – I feel that every family needs to figure it out for themselves. I will not take kindly to people telling me how I should do things either. ;)
Good tip on the ped. My GP already recommended a pediatric practice that is really close to our house, but I have no idea what their stances are on things. And woe be a doctor who won’t accept how I do things. I already get up in arms with any vet I deal with regarding my doggies… I’ve had a few discussions with them about not giving vaccinations (and luckily they’ve been pretty understanding and willing to roll with it). I have heard of other dog owners who had vets FLIP OUT though, so I expect with pediatritions it’ll be no different… some will be fine with it, some will get all snotty attitude on you.
I’m already wondering what the midwife/obgyn’s attitude will be regarding medication-free birth and the other things I will be wanting (like the ability to move around freely). Though I really like my midwife so I would be extremely loathe to go to someone else. She strikes me as the type who would be fine with whatever you want though. (She knew about charting and was just oh so helpful before I moved to the RE. Very nice lady.)
A lot of midwives are very open to any options, as are hospital nurses who are really the ones you’re interacting with if you deliver in a hospital. They really tried everything they could to make me comfortable and conform to my wishes, and even made suggestions on how to make it easier on me while I was going unmedicated. And birthing centers, well, they’re made for that kind of stuff. IVs move with you, the nurses had no problem with my dragging it around with me… And you might also look into hospitals around you to see which ones offer walking epidurals just in case you do change your mind. Mine didn’t offer them, I had thought they were a standard option but apparently not. Just a thought to keep your options open, having gone in dead set against an epidural myself, heh.
And see, the fact that you don’t see bottle feeding and daycare as harmful is a major difference between you and a lot of people who share your parenting philosophies. There are so many out there that readily say that formula is poison and make people feel awful if breastfeeding didn’t work out. I’ve learned to shrug them off, but for the longest time I felt like such a failure because of people like that.
Bah. Babies grow up on formula all the time for a variety of issues – I think breastmilk is probably the best, but so many people I know had problems preventing that. You can only do what you can do. Your baby is perfectly healthy. :) I mean look at my dogs. Do I think that home-made dog meals and fresh meat would be the absolute best thing for them? Yeah, probably. But we don’t have the money for it, the freezer space for it, or the stomach for dealing with animal innards. ;) I buy them a good-quality food and am fine with it.
About the hospital… well I think there’s really only one good choice in hospital, the big one that I go to for my infertility treatment. I know that they have a birthing/womens center attached though. I’ll find out more when I’m pregnant. But I have my fingers crossed.
That would be awesome if it has a center attached, you’d likely get exactly what you’re looking for in terms of care!
I just noticed that we agree on most of those points. I used to think that I’d have a seperate baby room with a crib for the baby but I think that for the first several weeks, I want a cosleeper. We don’t have dogs so it won’t be such a change for us. It kinda goes hand in hand with BFing because you can just roll over and feed as opposed to waking up and getting the baby and sitting in a glider to do it. It just seems really natural to me.
I also plan to be a SAHM, at least until full-time school starts. I would love to get something PT to help but only if I could do it from home.
About the circumcision, I hope you guys have a girl and then you won’t have to argue about it! I am not opposed to circumcision but I wish they could numb him on his little wee wee before they do it :(