Questions and Answers
[4w6d]
I thought I would take some time today to answer some questions people have asked in the comments. If you have more, let me have ’em!
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KC asked, “What is the EDD?”
Whoops, did I never post that? Bad me! Due date is May 25!
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Cynthia asked, “Are you planning on purchasing a doppler?”
That is my plan for now, yes. I won’t be getting one until the second trimester, however, because my uterus is tipped back and when I was pregnant with Devin even the midwife couldn’t get a heartbeat by doppler until 13 weeks. It may be sooner this time, but I really don’t want to stress myself out if I don’t need to. I plan to use the doppler just to “check in” on the baby before bed.
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Shilpa asks, “What are your thoughts on gender, in terms of what you would prefer? Obviously I KNOW that you will be beyond thrilled with whatever is in there, but I’m just curious whether you really want another boy, or you’d like to have a girl? Or are you completely neutral? What about with Devin’s pregnancy? Before you found out he was a boy, were you hoping for one or the other?”
I admit, when I got pregnant with Devin I really wanted a girl. I am the oldest, I have a little brother, and I always pictured having a little girl first, just like I was. But right from the start with Devin I told everyone I thought it was a boy. And, I admit, when we confirmed he was indeed a boy I was a little disappointed for a week that I wouldn’t be getting my frilly pink girl. Of course I quickly got over that and started loving having a boy.
After we lost Devin all I wanted was a little boy. Not to replace him – he could never be replaced – but because I had just spent the last 5 months living in a world of all things boy. I have boy clothes, I have boy toys… I was – am – a boy mama with no boy to raise. So a very big part of me wants another boy.
On the other hand, I think having a girl would be easier because of the loss – it would be different. I could buy new things, collect new clothes… it would be another way that this pregnancy would be obviously different from Devin’s. Maybe that would mean less anxiety. And of course, I do still want a little girl someday.
At this point when it comes right down to it I don’t think I care. Either one would be great. Den and I want both a girl and a boy someday, if we are lucky.
Oh, and I have a gut feeling of girl this time. So we’ll see.
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Mari asks, “Can I ask you what names are you having in mind for your second baby?”
Names are a funny thing. We’ve had a list of names for a long time, and while sometimes we shuffle around the order the actual list hasn’t changed much. Devin Alin was our absolute, by-far favorite boy name of all time and I’m still sad that I don’t have anything else that gives me that same feeling.
Our boy’s name is Lucas Wyatt. I will call him Luke (but Den won’t let me use that as the official birth-certificate name). The only small hitch with this one is that we love Wyatt as a first name, so there’s a part of us that wants to save it just in case we end up with yet another boy. My choices if we split them up would be Lucas Andrew and Wyatt Cole, but Den basically said that I will be allowed to use the name Cole over his dead body, so apparently that’s off the table. LOL!
Our girl’s name is currently Katherine Elizabeth, called Kate. My only reservation with it is that it’s a pretty big name for a little girl, and it’s also very traditional… I’d like to have something a little bit more offbeat in there somewhere. The other name that was on the table was Cailet Amber – this is the one that Den’s pushing hard for, but I’m pushing back because it’s very offbeat, it’s a made-up name (it’s from a book) and I dread no one ever being able to spell or pronounce her name. (It’s KAY-let.) My third girl’s name is Alyssa Marie, but Den doesn’t like that very much so it’ll probably never get used.
So basically we kind of know, but we’re not sure of anything yet. It’ll probably end up being one of those two, but it might not be.
Alyssa Marie? Dude, quit stealing my girl’s name! Grumble grumble. It’s a darn good thing Den doesn’t like it… LOL.
5 weeks tomorrow, squee!
What, are you going to use it? Huh? Huh??
Can I push for Cailet Amber too :D If only because the book where both Cailet and Alin came from is one of my favorites PLUS I only read it because of your husband PLUS both names have (how could they not) very good connotations in my mind and are reminiscent of really good times.
I owe a LOT to Denis. I’m not sure if I ever told him that, but he made me realize there are very decent guys out there and in essence that is what lead to me living my life as it is right now. Cailet makes me think of him and how kind he was, and that gives me a warm fuzzy feeling inside ;)
That said, I absolutely love Katherine Elizabeth as well, especially spelled with the K instead of the C. Kate is a very powerful, confident name, I like it muchly.
As for the boys names – I like Lucas better than Wyatt as a first name, but hey, that’s entirely personal ;)
I just wanted to add that I love the name Katherine Elizabeth, with Kate for short. We were originally going to name our daughter, Morgan Elizabeth. A couple days before I was induced my husband decided he liked Morgan Hope better, so we changed it. We thought Hope was more fitting with our infertility journey. Maybe Katherine Hope would work for you guys?
those are awesome baby names….its sooo difficult when it comes to picking names.. i think it had taken us until 2 weeks before Cam was born to get his name.. His father wanted Anthony.. i was not too fond of “tony” or the fact we were not italian lol…but hey you will figure it out especially when you meet that baby… btw you are planning on finding out the sex right?
Cynthia – Oh hell yes! As soon as possible!
Had I had another girl, I would have chosen the name Katherine Elizabeth! Wow!
Random thought: what about Cailet as a middle name instead of first, a compromise on it? Of course, that still wouldn’t work so well with Katherine…
No, it definitely wouldn’t worth with Katherine. *I’d* be totally open to it… not sure about Den.
Katherine Elizabeth is such a beautiful, pure and noble name.
Ok I have to say I love the name Den picked! But Im a huge person for randon names – I like ones that no one has ever heard of!!! But either way I am sure she will be beautiful!
I cant wait – are you going to find out what you are having? Im assuming with all the talk that you will but I wont assume anything!
i love cailet! that is just beautiful :) i also realllllyyyy like amber and have thought of that as a possible middle name if we have a girl i think isla as a first name. as for lucas-that’s on my list too, my favorite is leo-but hubby doesn’t really care for it. i think lucas is such a handsome name!
Lurker de-lurking here ;-)
I love all the names you’ve picked, seems like we have a very similar taste in names! I agree with most of the other commenters, though, I like Cailet Amber best. It’s original and has a nice flow to it :)
love the names you have chosen, May 25th was my due date with my little guy. Wishing you all the best Nat!
Woo Hoo May baby!! Yea!! How wonderful for you. I’m thinking pink. Donno why. At least I have a 50/50 shot at being right :)