I am a little concerned about my main incision, but at this point it’s really hard to tell if it’s something normal or a little weird. To me it looks weird, but I don’t exactly get injured very often. It’s a little bump under the healing incision site, a little pinkish, but it’s not scary red, not weeping, not hot to the touch. So for right now I’m just watching it to see if it gets worse or better.

Of course Den peered at either side of my belly button and frowned. I sighed. I have a rash there – from where my bandaid adhesive was. Yep. Little pink spots in exactly the shape of the bandaid. WTF? Never gotten that before. And where the other bandaids were, on my lower incisions, no rash. Plus the area below my belly button has faded into a nice bright yellow bruise. All in all it’s very sexy.

::

I called the nurse again today about whether or not I can take birth control pills this cycle. She called back to let me know that she… doesn’t know. She’s put the question in to my doctor and will get back to me tomorrow hopefully. I would just really like to get this cycle set in some kind of known schedule, rather than sit around waiting for my body to maybe ovulate at some point… but obviously the first concern is getting my body back to “normal” after this miscarriage.

I’m just tired of the unpredictable. I want something to be a little bit dependable… as if there were such a thing in this journey.