Just a few minutes ago I felt what could have been my period starting, so I ran to the bathroom. Nope, nothing. Must have just been cervical fluid or something… no spotting, not even a hint of color.

I had a nap and woke up after a few hours and quickly took my temp. Low. :( But since I already took my temp today – and I’d only slept for 2 hours – it doesn’t mean much. I’ll have to see what tomorrow’s temp brings. Hoping that low temp was just a freak thing and wasn’t indicative of tomorrow’s.

I love this design. Don’t you? I added a sheep to the header, hehehe. Took me a while to find an appropriate sheep clip-art graphic. Our theme is definitely going to be moon and stars with sheep sprinkled in. Den said he’s not all that thrilled with the sheep – not his thing – but he knows that they’re important to me. (Two reasons why: first, I got this stuffed sheep from my Oma when I was 1 year old. I still have it. I LOVE that sheep. I slept with it a lot. It’s one of my prized childhood possessions. Second, I was the head of the White Ajah at DM for a long time, and somehow the sheep became our mascot. It was a huge inside joke. So after all of that, I’ve developed a very strong attachment to sheep!) I like the pink… and I didn’t think I would. It just adds a cute sponteneity to the design. :D

I bought our first baby thing today. I didn’t intend to, and it’s nothing big (no clothes or anything), but it was at the dollar tree and I saw it and just HAD to have it – and the dollar tree is not really a place where you can say “I’ll come back later and buy it.” They’re wall “stickers” – sheep! Yes, sheep. :) 10 sheep, each numbered 1 – 10. So not only will it add more sheepiness to the room, but it’ll teach the baby its numbers. Hee.

Well this morning I woke up a little after 3am and kind of stayed in that half-awake state for a while. When I really came awake and realized there’s no way I was going back to sleep, I took my temp. It’s not way down, but it’s actual value could be contested because I was tossing and turning there for a while.

So I got up and took two tests – one Equate, one AccuClear. I’m paranoid that when I do get my BFP I’ll choose the wrong brand and won’t see it at first, lol. Well, both tests are negative. :( I’m so sad. But I’m just praying as hard as I can that it’s just too early and AF won’t come… and in another few days I’ll get my positive. Sigh.

So yep, a new design. :) More in line with what I want to do with the baby’s room. It was sooo blue, so I added a shot of pink in the links, lol!

Well I just measured my boobs. Bust/underbust is 36/32. That makes me about a 36D. D!

Also, waist was 29 and hips were 41. Talk about hourglass.

Oh my god! I’m now up over 140 lbs. (Like, 144.) Fuckity fuck.

I just took a pregnancy test. I sit here waiting for it to come out. It’s kind of crazy how much I am willing a line to come up. Nothing so far. :( Of course I’m only 11 dpo. But a girl can hope.

I wish my body would stop giving me signals at all. No sore boobs, no spotting, no nothing. Pregnant or not. Then I could just wait until my period came. But every month it does something weird that makes me hope. Bah. Bad body. Bad.

Edit: BF Negative. Sigh. :(

I’ve had to pee so much today since I got up it’s just insane. I actually woke up at 5pm because I dreamed I had to pee and was running to find a bathroom. When I woke up I think my eyes were floating. And ever since then… gah! I went to bed at like 11, woke up an hour or so later and peed. Went back to bed. Couldn’t sleep, so I got up again… and peed. Watched tv. Peed. Watched more tv. Peed, went back to bed. And now it’s been about an hour and I have to pee AGAIN. I’m actually trying NOT to, because I wanted to take a preg test in the morning, which I won’t be able to do if this keeps up. (You want concentrated urine to test with.)

I’m not happy tonight, no I’m not.

Well I’m starting to head over from wanting to be pregnant to wanting a baby. I see photos of those cute little faces and I just melt inside. I want one of those. I want to be able to hold him or her and love them, just like I do Zoe. Of course I still want to be pregnant. Not like I have a choice, kind of a required step. ;)

Sigh, but I’m getting worried. I know this is only our fourth month trying but I’ve heard so many stories about people getting pregnant on their first or second months trying. Den’s mom, our friends, relatives… except for Mat, she’s the only one I know of who had problems conceiving (and they were pretty serious problems). I just hope we’re just unlucky and that there’s not a serious problem with one of us. :(

Come on baby. Mom needs to be reassured here. I’ll be testing in a few days, so if you could at least just let me know you’re there, that would be really really great.

Note for Kel and Jen – Check ebay for bassinets and bedding. I just did a quick search and found bassinets for WAY cheaper than I was finding anywhere else (they were actually affordable), and found the bedding set I have my eye on for half of what I saw elsewhere, too.

I have my eye on this crib bedding set. I’ve been looking and looking for something in blue or other colors I didn’t despise, can’t find what I want. Then I thought, maybe a neutral bedding set against a blue wall wouldn’t be that bad. Then I took a closer look at this pattern and imagine my excitement when I sawe not only moons and stars but sheep! That’s everything I love in one! :D What a kick-ass idea, to combine the two. (Even if I don’t get that bedding set – it is pretty expensive – I think I’ll decorate the room with both things. :) )

Edit: Holy crap! Den liked that bedding set!! :shock: (He said, “Inoffensive colors. It’s nice.” )