Slept through the night!
So that last post? I went to bed because I didn’t hear her moving around anymore. I then woke up at 6am with a start and realized she never woke up. First emotion: elation! Second emotion: fear. I tried going back to bed but that wasn’t happening. I crept into her room and laid my hand lightly on her back to feel her breathing in and out. I then did it again, just for extra reassurance. My therapist told me the first time she slept through the night I’d think something happened to her… well she was right. Not freaking out of my mind panic, but just the kind of nagging “what if” that you really can’t let go of until you check just to be SURE. Of course she was fine, she had just slept through the night. 7 hours. Without me. In her room. Holy SHIT. This kid still typically goes 2 hours without me, max. When I went in there I found her sound asleep on the other side of the bed where she had crawled over onto my blanket (I keep one in there for when I sleep with her). Apparently she likes the softer feeling… not that I blame her. Most importantly she clearly woke up, move around and put herself back to sleep. Without crying. And slept another 3+ hours.
My excitement about this event was slightly diminished by a few comments of, “8 months old and her first time sleeping through the night? Wow, I’m sorry.” I don’t even bother getting into the whole explanation. I can sort of understand – if I was getting up and running into her room five times a night I would indeed be rather sleep-deprived and would want the situation to change as soon as possible. But I’m not, and I don’t. To me it’s like her learning how to crawl…. it’s another milestone in her development, whether it happens at 3 months or 9 months.
Also I really have to bite my tongue around the people who told us that she would never learn to sleep if we didn’t let her cry to “teach” her. No crying. No training. Just gentle encouragement and little baby steps along the way. I’m pretty certain that one day she’ll be sleeping on her own in her own room every night, one day I’ll be able to read her a story and kiss her and she’ll fall asleep. But it was nice that people made me feel slightly neurotic about her sleep habits, I really needed that. Maybe it’s a rite of passage that all mothers need to worry that they’re screwing up their children.
The night following she did not sleep through again, but I was actually really glad she didn’t. Den was out late and I was tired so I went to bed after putting Kate down. I was tired and yet… I just layed there, awake. My baby was asleep in her own room, my husband was out, and the dogs were downstairs (they have to stay downstairs until he comes home because they bark like mad when he comes in). Normally we’re all in the bedroom. Normally there’s three of us sharing the bed. Now I can go without my husband, he snores. But wow did I feel lonely. And I realized how much better I feel when she’s sleeping next to me. Yes it’s a little harder physically, I have to sleep in certain positions and give up a portion of my side of the bed (who am I kidding, I have to give up most of it!). But emotionally and mentally it is so much easier. It is so reassuring to be able to touch her, to see her breathing. It’s such a special time when we go to bed to cuddle up to her, to hold her while she is peaceful and sleeping. One day she’ll be too big and the moment will have passed. I will always be thankful that I took the opportunity while I had it.
Awww Nat,congrats on her first full nights sleep :) She may not do it again for a while so you still have lots of time to snuggle momma ;)
I sat and nodded as I read this post..remembering all the comments moms make about kids and sleep.It seemed that most moms had their tiny babies sleep routines under control,and there I was,a year into being a mother and still wondering when and if that would happen for me..
When they´d hear me talk about co-sleeping and BFing,they´d roll their eyes and say “well you should stop that,BFing leads to night time nursing,which leads to co-sleeping..you´ll never get her out of your bed! You should train her to sleep all night,she should have been doing that months ago!”.Great,its funny how no one ever bothers to ask if the situation works for you,how could it?? *sigh*
Noe will be 3 in 3 months time,and she´s still in my room and still spends half of the night in my bed.We sleep,and I love having here there,so even though she *should* have moved out and found a job when she was 4 months old,Im fine with her sticking around lol.
Sounds like you´re doing great!!!
My response would be much like Gina’s. Angus didn’t sleep through until 11 months (coincidentally when he started crawling – more tired I guess!) and we got all those comments. He was BF (and still is at 15 months) and was in and out of our bed. We didn’t do any “training” or “letting him cry it out” and we got there in the end. Like you say, gentle encouragement and I can’t remember the last time I had to feed him at night now. We still sometimes have to get up to him one or two times for the dummy (paci) but that’s about it. Persistence did pay off and while it was damn hard at the time, I look back and am proud of myself for getting through it.
Go Kate!
Mini spent 3 hrs in his bed alone last night before I went to join him. And even though he was asleep and the monitor was quiet, I still kept waking up looking for him. I think it’s almost harder on me to sleep alone now.
We haven’t gotten there yet, but besides the sleeping 7 hours thing, I could have written this post! I can’t say enough how much I love your blog.
I just wanted to say that I never let my child
“cry it out”, ever. And, he didn’t fully sleep through the night until well over a year old. Did it suck? Yes it did. It was hard. Brutal even. But would I change it? No I wouldn’t. He is a happy well-adjusted unspoiled sweet boy who is growing WAY too fast. These years don’t last -you do what you feel is best for your baby, and ignore everyone else. Now he sleeps through the night 7:30 pm to 8 am every morning – and I am happy with how we got there. With no tears, and his confidence that Momma is always there for him when he needs me.
Follow your instincts! Go Momma!
I never let Kendall “cry it out”. I figured if she was scared or needed me I wanted to be there for her and give her that sense of security(besides I can tell the difference in the “just wanting attention” cry and the “I really need you” cry). They are only little for such a short time and then you don’t have the opportunity to snuggle like this anymore. I really didn’t mind getting up with her and sneaking in a few extra kisses. She is 15 months old now and is sleeping through the night for about 2 months now and I still go in to check her breathing all the time. I will probably never stop. I never heard of a 6 year old not sleeping through the night so don’t listen to anyone else. Do what your heart tells you is right for you and that sweet baby girl.
Dominic never cried it out either. And while I had to lay down with him until he fell asleep till he was about 2- 2.5. He went to bed so well after that and still does. Can you believe hes 6? anyway, you are right, you havent doomed her to a life of not knowing how to sleep. I love that I spent so much cuddly time with my kiddo looking back, I think it really made us closer. anyway, Im rambling, things sound great for you. so glad to see it :)
The answer of an exrtep. Good to hear from you.
That’s fabulous!!! :) I STILL worry when I don’t hear E much at night. We’ve just recently stopped checking on him in his room all the time b/c we were just disturbing him, but I still worry so much.