Also…
I am so glad I’m back to feeling numb again today. Days when I don’t feel numb hurt so much I’m pretty much unable to function. I’m glad they are interspersed together…. too many numb days and I feel guilty… too many emotional days and it’s too overwhelming and painful. I am so glad my brain gives me breaks.
I just wanted to send you hugs and kisses. I am glad you are getting a little break today from the neverending thoughts. I’m thinking of you always. XOXO
After awhile it seems like people drift away – just wanted to let you know that you and Devin are still being thought of and wished well. I know this is a sad and difficult path you walk, so I am grateful for any respite you find – whether in a little understanding (even if in a different way) from your father or being number, even though briefly.
I really related so much to what you said in this post. I lost my baby girl, Caroline, 6 weeks ago yesterday and I actually look forward to my ‘numb’ days, since I almost start to feel normal (then guilty). It’s strange what cripples me one day, like seeing a baby girl dressed in pink, does not seem to affect me at all another day. Sending you best wishes as you deal with this, no one should have to know what this feels like.