It’s becoming a nightly ritual for me to recline in bed with my belly uncovered and watch it move around. Devin still gets quite active when I sit or lay down, especially in the evenings, so when I lay here in bed he almost always starts up. It’s just so… amazing. Feeling and watching him move makes me feel more connected than ever to him. I picture him laying in there, all curled up, being nourished and protected by my body. He is getting so big! It’s amazing just how much I love him already. I can only imagine how much more I’ll feel when I meet him.

Today I brought out my and my brother’s old baby memory book and photo album. My mom faithfully kept written notes on all my firsts… sitting, crawling, teething, walking, talking… you name it. It’s great to have. I think I’m going to scan them all in to the computer…. I’d like to have a backup copy, especially of the stuff written on loose paper. To me those books are practically the most valuable things in this house. I’ll also try to scan in some of the photos… I want all of them, but there are SO many it would take me months to get them all scanned in. Right in the beginning of the photo album there is a photo of my mother at 9 months pregnant with me, standing in their front garden. It was taken one day before I was born, and I was a week late. And she was TINY! Tiny little baby belly! My goodness!

I really had fun tonight looking through my brother’s baby album, imaginging what Devin will look like. I almost got all teary-eyed. Mom said I should ask MIL if she has any baby photos of Den, I would LOVE to see those!

Gosh I’m becoming a totally sentimental pregnant lady. I just cannot possibly describe how freaking amazing this is. I know I’ve talked (what seems like ad-nauseum) about the wonder I feel but it’s never enough… it never really expresses everything that I feel. I seriously tear up watching my belly move. (Which makes it hard to watch the belly.)

I feel like this has been the best, most wonderful, most crazy and amazing experience of my life, bar none.

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This morning I just happened to be up and unable to sleep – combination of needing to pee and then having a stuffed up nose, enough that I couldn’t fall back asleep. Mom came in and told me to have a shower, we were going out for breakfast. Now to be honest I had my suspicions, I mean my mom usually gives me notice when she has something planned like that.

We got to the restaurant and the woman said, “Oh, you’re here for the baby shower?” Tee hee!! We walked into the back room and the ladies (some of mom’s friends, my aunt, grandma, cousin, and some of the older friends of the family) were chatting away and didn’t notice us come in. I said, “Surprize!” They all sat bolt-upright and said, “Agghhh!!! Surprize!!!” LOL! Then they were muttering that they’d never had the guest of honor walk in and surprize everyone ELSE.

So we all had a fantastic breakfast, I had a big waffle with strawberries and whipped cream. I opened some gifts – some gorgeous cards (seriously, where do they find these??), some very cute baby clothes, and the rest of them put money in so we could buy a crib! When I get home I’ll deposit the money into our account and then order it! It’s just so exciting to me – the first big “item” we’ll have purchased or received.

I really did have a great time, it was small and simple and just perfect. :) The “baby boy” balloons and teddy bear topiary covered with little baby items (brush, soap, cream, etc) were just so adorable. One of the women who organized it (my mother’s best friend) took photos of everything, so I’ll find a way to post them all soon as I get them.

One really interesting thing from the shower…. the baby gifts I did get were inside a towel-lined cardboard box. My aunt pointed out the box at one point and told me to look it over closer. It’s an obviously old box, rectangular with hand holes at each end. Inside it my first name and last initial (maiden name) is scrawled in large printing. Apparently this box was what I was sent home from the hospital in. My mom did say that they had a carseat for me, but the hospital provided this box for whatever reason, some sort of cardboard bassinett (mom couldn’t really remember exactly). My mom had absolutely no idea that this box was still around, but my uncle found it in their garage a while ago and kept it for the shower. Isn’t that crazy?

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Tonight I went out to have dinner with some of my old college friends while I’m still in town. We had a good dinner, and it was nice to just sit and chat and catch up with them. I did make a very big mistake, though. When leaving the restaurant I had half a thought to use the washroom, but for whatever reason I decided not to. Bad. Idea. We had to take the train back to where I’d parked, and by that point my bladder was in some serious pain. When we got off the train I spied a McDonald’s and excused myself to run in and use their washroom. It helped, but I was still feeling pain all the way home. Ouch. Just very very tender inside. I really should know better than that, pregnant women cannot ignore the need to pee! Let that be a lesson to me!

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I really need to get to sleep now. I didn’t get around to taking a belly pic today due to the surprize shower and subsequent nap, then being out all evening. I will be sure to take one tomorrow! I sure am looking bigger and rounder. (I just lurve it!)

Tonight I was sitting in the basement with my brother watching TV and chatting with him. The baby was starting to get quite active, so I had a hand on my belly to feel the kicks. I looked at my brother with a grin and said, “You want to feel the baby?”

There wasn’t even a pause before he said, “No!! That’s just… weird!”

I laughed and said it felt like something tapping on my insides. He shuddered dramatically and said, “Ewwww.”

Sometimes they are still little brothers – even when they’re “grown up”. LOL! Of course, this is a person who sticks his finger in his belly-button and then chases my mother around because he knows it grosses her out…. so I’m not so certain you could categorize him as “grown up” yet anyways. ;)

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I do make it a habit to go down to his room and sit there and chat with him every day. I used to do that all the time before I moved, and I really miss it.

Saturday night I was out with my college friends all evening for dinner. I ended up not getting home until 11:30. I walked in and poked my head into my brother’s room where he was gabbing with a friend, and he said, “I forgot you’d gone out. I was thinking, ‘Nat hasn’t come downstairs yet. Weird.’ And then I remembered you weren’t here.”

Later that evening, as I sat at my laptop checking in on things online he comes wandering into my bedroom with a cookie and a glass of coke, settles himself on the floor, and starts telling me about this and that. I love that I’m his sounding board. I am not in his circle of friends, I am not going to gossip, I am not going to judge. I just listen. I just feel extremely priviledged that he lets me in on his life like that.

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Today the whole family was in the car driving home from somewhere and my dad started complaining (yes he does this often) about some passing car’s headlights. “Fog lights, pah! There’s no fog! And those are too bright to be fog lights! They’re ditch lights!”

Cory and I said at the exact same moment, “Bitch lights!” Then we looked at each other and started giggling.

Sometimes I think we share a brain. (And no, we’re not twins!)