I called and left a message asking for the doctor to call me back. I just wanted to know if they know WHY it happened. She just called me back.<\/p>\n
I asked if they know the cause, and she said no… that there are many possible reasons, but that they may not ever know exactly what caused it in our case. She said sometimes it’s poor morphology or other sperm problems, but Den’s S\/As were always perfectly normal. So she said they do think it’s probably the sperm’s fault, not the egg’s, but they really can’t say for sure. And I’m sure part of their opinion is due to me being 24, with presumably healthy eggs. (I keep telling Den that my eggs could just be bitches, though, and not be letting anyone in. I’ve always liked my alone time, you know.)<\/p>\n
She said we will definitely benefit from ICSI next time. I asked if they ICSI all the eggs, and she said all of the mature ones. So that’s good to know. Next time we’ll hopefully have a much better fertilization report.<\/p>\n
She also said that next time they might lower my dosage a bit… that they don’t need<\/i> as huge a response as I got, and of course they don’t want to put me at risk of OHSS. And I totally understand that. I think I’ll just trust her lead on that one. She knows how to get the best result with the least amount of risk.<\/p>\n
And of course she reminded me that we do<\/i> have one normal fertilized embryo, and we will hopefully be having a transfer this weekend. She said she’ll be honest, that she doesn’t not real confident in the one… but that there’s always hope. To be perfectly honest I am really freaked out about having just one embryo. If there had been none fertilized of course it would be a more horrible shock… but now I’m feeling strung along. At any point it could die and crush me again. I’m just terrified. If there were a lot of eggs losing a few wouldn’t be such a big deal. But when there’s one, losing any is obviously a big deal. But I really really hope that our problem was only fertilization… and that since that one embryo made it past that point that it’ll grow and flourish… that it just needed a chance to get past that hurdle.<\/p>\n
But you know what’s really scaring me right now? This was one of two insurance-covered IVFs. If this one doesn’t work, then we’ll do it again, with hopefully a better result… and get pregnant. But that’s the end of our insurance. We really want two children, and we always had insurance-covered cycles as backup. Yet again, we could run out of backups. I guess I really shouldn’t worry about that now. If we end up with one child and one child only, well at least we’ll have the one to dote on and love and spoil. And hell, it appears that one out of 24 eggs can fertilize. So maybe we’ll get pregnant with a micracle over the span of several years. Maybe. Or, more likely, we’ll switch to a different insurance with more benefits.<\/p>\n
When I pick Den up we’ll have a long talk about where to go from here.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I called and left a message asking for the doctor to call me back. I just wanted to know if they know WHY it happened. She just called me back. I asked if they know the cause, and she said no… that there are many possible reasons, but that they may not ever know exactly […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":71,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[34,7],"class_list":["post-669","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","tag-ivf1","tag-thoughts-and-emotions"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/669","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/71"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=669"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/669\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=669"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=669"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=669"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}