Well something may or may not be happening – at this point it could be anything. I’m having contractions, but it’s not like that hasn’t happened before several times. They’re very light, almost hard to tell I’m having one if I’m up and doing something. (At least they’re not the vice-grip won’t-let-go braxton hicks I’ve gotten used to – I have come to severely dislike those.)<\/p>\n
The interesting part is how I react when it crosses my mind that, shit, I could go into labor at any second and have this baby.<\/p>\n
First: Disbelief. There’s no way. Nooo. To try to wrap my brain around going to the hospital like I keep picturing in my head? To giving birth? Mental blankness.<\/p>\n
Second: I’m not ready yet. No wonder I’ve been all calm when everyone close to me is all anxious to meet this baby. They don’t have to give birth, I do! I mean, I know I’ve been preparing myself for labor for weeks and all, but… am I really ready to bring home a baby? To be done with the pregnancy? Suddenly I feel like I wouldn’t be disappointed if this all just trails off and I end up pregnant for another week.<\/p>\n
Third: Holy shit I need to clean my house<\/i>. That’s like the first thing that occurred to me when I realized I’d had a couple of contractions – I jumped up and started cleaning the kitchen. Everything “dirty” or cluttered has been bothering me all day, I took a long nap… and now suddenly I feel like I must get it ALL done. I cannot have this baby until this house is clean! Spotless! I can’t come home to dishes! I can’t come home to clutter!<\/p>\n
The little contractions are still putzing around. I guess it’s just a wait-and-see game. I didn’t really want to post anything until I’m sure I’m actually IN labor, but I also really want to write down everything. Just… don’t get too excited yet. I’m going to bed. If I wake up in labor, I’ll post. LOL<\/p>\n
Update: Little contractions all night, I slept through most of it. Definitely didn’t wake up in full-fledged labor! So either this is just a precursor or a very slow start. I’m just going to take it easy today (or try to) in case it kicks in later.<\/p>\n
Update 2: Well the contractions fizzled out after I woke up, so I went back to bed. Now it feels like I’m back to the same old waiting pattern. But I am encouraged that my body is getting prepared!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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