Suddenly today I’ve started getting really, really anxious. I did meditate for an hour at noon, which helped me settle down for a little bit. I didn’t want to just sleep the day away so afterwards I made myself get up, go out, and get some work done.<\/p>\n
I triggered at 5:30. Yes, that’s 2 hours earlier than scheduled. Den and I decided to do another 38 hour interval instead of the typical 36. It’s my last-ditch effort to help my eggs mature that last little bit. (We’ve done a 38 hour interval before, with no ill effects, but it’s always a little nerve-wracking.) As I was preparing the shot I was getting a little flushed and sweaty, just from nerves about the IM shot. I went over with Den again how to do it, gave him the needle, leaned forward. I felt a poke and he said, “Shit! It wouldn’t go in!” and I was like damnit, do you have to do it again?! But no, it was already in and I didn’t feel anything beyond the poke. Awesome<\/i>. That buttcheek was a tiny tiny bit sore for the next hour or two, but nothing<\/i> like what I was fearing. (I didn’t use an ice pack or anything this time. I’m done with the stupid ice. I think the freezing hurts more than the needle pokes.)<\/p>\n
So that being done I just sit here and fret. About everything<\/i>. The trigger, the follicle count, how fast they grew in the last day, my general proclivity towards immature eggs, the possibility that even the mature ones won’t fertilize, and so on and so forth. I am just sitting here, rubbing my belly, hoping beyond hope that everything is growing properly in there. I wish I could check on them, I wish I had some kind of little ball that told me how many of them were going to be any good. I have all my data plugged into my spreadsheet, but there comes a point at around IVF #5 that you realize that data is great for review but sucks<\/i> at predicting anything at all. I could sit here for years comparing cycles and E2 levels and follicle counts and I would still have no better clue what’s going to happen on tuesday than taking a wild guess.<\/p>\n
Pretty much just pacing the house today. Watched a movie. Went to the bank. Meditated. It was a whole lot of “nothing to do” with a lot of “stressing” to fill it with. Ugh. I might try another massage therapist this week, if I can… I still don’t feel like I’ve found the right person, and I really think some de-stressing would be great right about now. Any other suggestions for short-notice stress relief?<\/p>\n
It’s so weird to have an entire day between trigger and retrieval. At least I have a lot of work to do in that time to make up for the day I’ll be missing, but agh. I want to be in retrieval now<\/i>!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Suddenly today I’ve started getting really, really anxious. I did meditate for an hour at noon, which helped me settle down for a little bit. I didn’t want to just sleep the day away so afterwards I made myself get up, go out, and get some work done. I triggered at 5:30. Yes, that’s 2 […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":71,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[208,136,297,296],"class_list":["post-2223","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-ivf-5","tag-stims","tag-stress","tag-trigger"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2223","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/71"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2223"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2223\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2227,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2223\/revisions\/2227"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2223"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2223"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2223"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}