When I told Den he came in and gave me a big hug and we just sat there for a while. He said he’s going to make an appointment with his doctor to get a Sperm Analysis done. I pointed out that we don’t know if our insurance will cover it, he just said, “It’s important.” He thinks that’s our problem. In a way I’m kind of afraid that the numbers will come back good, because then it means something might be wrong with me. I know it’s foolish, but sometimes I think that it’s because of my depression – that my body doesn’t think I should get pregnant and be a mother.<\/p>\n
I was thinking about how we were going to start TTC this month. I never thought when we started in November that I wouldn’t be pregnant already. We started early and are no further ahead than if we hadn’t – except maybe that I have a good idea of what my body’s doing now. I can pinpoint my ovulation based on several signals now: my temp jump, obviously; my cervical fluid is fertile beforehand; my breasts start hurting; and my sleeping patterns get screwed up. And that’s all without any ovulation predictors, which don’t seem to be working for me at all.<\/p>\n
I’m just so upset. I’m trying not to cry when AF comes, but every month it gets harder not to. I see other people getting pregnant, I see really cute baby things… and I just want it for myself. I want it to be my<\/i> turn to start a baby registry and have a growing tummy. I want our little bean.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
When I told Den he came in and gave me a big hug and we just sat there for a while. He said he’s going to make an appointment with his doctor to get a Sperm Analysis done. I pointed out that we don’t know if our insurance will cover it, he just said, “It’s […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":71,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[7],"class_list":["post-189","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","tag-thoughts-and-emotions"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/189","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/71"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=189"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/189\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=189"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=189"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=189"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}