I am kicking myself for the time I wasted. I was pregnant for 8 months out of a total now of 38 months since we started trying to have a baby – that’s a lot more time being not-pregnant than actually pregnant. But I have lived those entire 38 months as if I was pregnant, or could be at any given month. I put off a lot of things, or just didn’t think of planning them in the first place. I mean, I was going to be pregnant, right?<\/p>\n
So here I sit, 3 years and 2 months later, wondering why we never went skiing, or bought season passes to Six Flags. And yet I fall into the same problem, don’t I. I could be pregnant in March.<\/p>\n
But I am not pregnant now<\/i>. I have decided to stop living for the future quite so much. I want to do all those things I never got around to doing.<\/p>\n
Today at work some girls were talking about horse riding. I asked some questions and found out the stable offers horse riding lessons for not that much money. I sat and pondered for a little bit, then said, “I want to go horse riding.” So it’s only January and fucking cold out – I want to ride a horse. So I’m going to.<\/p>\n
Next week we plan on going skiing. I love to ski, my dad, brother and I used to go quite often when I was in highschool. But in college we went less and less often, and now it’s been probably 5 years since I have gone skiing at all. I miss it. I’m terribly excited about getting to go with my husband – we’ve never skiied together before. It will be a fabulous escape for a day.<\/p>\n
And if spring comes before I get pregnant we will be going to Six Flags.<\/p>\n
I’m tired of waiting. It’s time to live.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I am kicking myself for the time I wasted. I was pregnant for 8 months out of a total now of 38 months since we started trying to have a baby – that’s a lot more time being not-pregnant than actually pregnant. But I have lived those entire 38 months as if I was pregnant, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":71,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[76,78,69],"class_list":["post-1478","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-ivf-3","tag-ivf-4","tag-loss"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1478","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/71"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1478"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1478\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1480,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1478\/revisions\/1480"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1478"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1478"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1478"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}