So apparently I have morning sickness. Wait… what?? I’m not pregnant yet! How can I have morning sickness?? I have no clue, and yet… here I am, feeling nauseated as all hell.<\/p>\n
Yesterday morning I cooked a big omelette for breakfast. Den got a large half, I got a small half. I took one bite… and immediately felt very ill. I actually ended up throwing up the one bite. I didn’t feel like eating much until a few hours later. But me and eggs, we don’t always get along, so I shrugged it off.<\/p>\n
This morning I didn’t eat breakfast at all. I was driving to Costco to pick up the order for work, and I just felt so<\/i> nauseated. Like I had to heave really, really bad. But I was in the truck. So I just focussed on breathing through my nose, taking big gulps of air when I had to. When I pulled into the parking lot I pushed the door open, fell out, and immediately started dry heaving. For like two minutes.<\/p>\n
So I ask you – what the fuck<\/i> was that?? Is it a coincidence that this started the day after I started stims? Is my mind playing games with me? But if that were the case, why on earth would I be “tricking” myself into morning sickness before retrieval? That sounds completely non-sensical. Last pregnancy I didn’t get sick until I was 6 weeks pregnant, and I certainly didn’t expect anything different. This is so weird.<\/p>\n
::<\/p>\n
This morning I was thinking about how it’s been a year and a half since my last IVF. It’s really hanging over my head. I mean… holy crap. This weekend will mark 9 months since we lost Devin. That’s an entire pregnancy length. How did that go so fast? I have now been not-pregnant for as long as I was pregnant, and that seems significant somehow.<\/p>\n
I really hope this cycle works, for so many reasons. The timing just seems right. Not that I believe in signs anymore (ha, yeah right), but it all just seems right<\/i>. Meaningful. 9 months in, 9 months out, 9 months in. I’m ready to take this on again. I’ve been<\/i> ready.<\/p>\n
I just hope this is my time again, that I don’t have to wait any longer. In a little over a week we should have an embryo. And that is definitely significant, knowing how few embryos I’ve ever been able to create.<\/p>\n
Hope. That damnable, blessed thing. Hope.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
So apparently I have morning sickness. Wait… what?? I’m not pregnant yet! How can I have morning sickness?? I have no clue, and yet… here I am, feeling nauseated as all hell. Yesterday morning I cooked a big omelette for breakfast. Den got a large half, I got a small half. I took one bite… […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":71,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[76,69],"class_list":["post-1373","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-ivf-3","tag-loss"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1373","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/71"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1373"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1373\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1373"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1373"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lunardreams.net\/baby\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1373"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}