Relaxing Doesn't Make Babies

Well poop

March 3, 2011 — 12:54 am

First, this poem made me get all choked up. And then when Den came home I told him about it and choked up again. I’m such a sap. I’m going to bawl when Kate weans, I know I am.

::

Tonight while in the bath with Kate I happened to poke around in her mouth, then blinked and peered in there. There’s a tooth!!! This is rather shocking to me, as I had more or less resigned myself to having a gummy baby with no teeth while all the other babies have sprouted 5 or 6 by now. And she has had no signs that she was teething: no drool, no crankiness, no fever, nothing.

Well, except for the sleep issues. Now it starts to make sense… and I start to feel like an ass for the nights recently when I have been all, WTF why aren’t you sleeping! Fine then you can cry for a few minutes while I step out before I lose my temper.

Charting her sleep/wake patterns has actually been helpful, however. She’s had a pretty clear pattern of going to bed, waking every hour. Then after midnight she has consistently been sleeping two 4-hour stretches with nursing and falling right back to sleep right in the middle. That might not sounds like much to other people, but a 4-hour stretch is amazing for Kate, much less several days in a row. Previously I was thinking that she only slept longer stretches by herself during the day, since at midnight when she woke I’d take her to bed with me. (I wasn’t going to try to sleep in my room if she was going to wake me every hour, oh hell no.) I don’t know if the pattern is pure habit or something else, but at least now I know.

Today I had the opportunity to talk to the mom of twins of very different personalities. She did not do CIO with either baby, she hasn’t treated them any different. Yet one slept long stretches from day one and is now sleeping through the night in his crib, waking to play and fall back asleep again; the other cosleeps because he can’t stand to be away from her at night and wakes every two hours to nurse. Isn’t that crazy? I guess personality plays a huge part in it. Well I always knew what personality Kate is.

I am now at a crossroads about this whole sleep thing, especially since finding the tooth. We’ve made some good progress, like not nursing every wake-up anymore. But mostly this morning I was thinking about how bedtime – and even the middle of the night wake-ups – used to be a time for me to cuddle with her, reflect, and be grateful. The past week it’s turned into a struggle every time, inching away from her, watching what I say and do, twisting my body like a pretzel so she falls asleep without touching me. I don’t know if it’s worth it right now. I miss my baby, I miss sleeping with her, I miss enjoying her falling asleep in my arms. The really frustrating parts – the awake for an hour in the middle of the night, the tossing and turning and pushing me away and crying – are just a passing phase. Maybe what I need is not to make major changes, but just to have patience and let this pass by. Though I know now that I can make changes if I really want to.

And hey, chances are the next baby will be really easy in comparison!

::

Today after Kate’s bath I got us both dried off and she immediately crawled over to her bed, climbed up, and scooted over to her books to sit and play. She gets naked time after bath almost every day because she enjoys it and I figure it’s only right to let that bum air out and get some freedom! We do have some puddles sometimes, but eh what can you do. So she’s on her bed naked, playing happily with her books, and I pop out to the living room to read my email. Den says to me, “She’s in there by herself? Is she going to be okay?” We hear babbling from down the hall and I shrug. The room’s baby-proofed, she likes hanging out in there. “There’s nothing she can really get into.”

I check on her a few minutes later, hoping she hadn’t peed on the bed. And I freeze in the doorway and clap my hand over my mouth. POOP EVERYWHERE. There is poo on her bed, on her book, on her bum. First I jumped forward to quickly grab my pillow and the books that didn’t have poop on them. Then I ran to get the camera. She took the opportunity to play with this funny new substance, patting and smearing it like finger paint. Did I mention that she has the nasty sludgy peanut-butter I’m-eating-solids-now poop? It’s so gross!

Needless to say sheets went in the wash and Kate went back in the tub. And Den, after peering over my shoulder at the mess said, “Nothing she can get into, eh? This one’s all on you!”

8 responses to “Well poop”

  1. Sally says:

    Argh, happens every time! You think you’re safe to leave them for 5 mins in the nude then bam, poop situation!
    I must say, your little Kate does also sound like my neice. Lucy my niece is a month older and is having all the same sleep issues, and lo and behold, my sister found a tooth this morning as well!
    And that poem just about ruined me. Angus weaned last week, all on his very own. He was still feeding over night at 11 months, then dropped that, then dropped a day time feed, then over Christmas/New Year we were down to just morning and bedtime, then he dropped the morning feed a couple of weeks ago, then last week he refused his bed time feed. And has done every time I have offered it to him since. He’s 15 months and I was prepared to go much longer, but he called all the shots here and this happened despite me not being ready to let it go. I’m so glad and proud I made it that far though and pleased that he was able to do it at his own pace, which is what I always said I wanted. I just wanted a bit longer out of him! Selfish mummy I am!
    xo

  2. Gina says:

    OMG!!!! LMAO :D
    So sorry to laugh,but thats a classic and it has me in fits every time lol.At least you´re lucky she didnt put any in her mouth..thats all Im going to say about that ;)

    As for getting chocked up about the weaning poem..dont worry about that at all.I started worrying about Noelia weaning when she was Kates age too.I started to think about her not needing me and what Id do when she decided that she didnt need to nurse anymore,but there´s really nothing to worry about.
    I bet you´ll be ready to wean before she is.Im just waiting for Noe to decide to stop,but she still ADORES nursing and still needs it every chance she can get..she´ll be 3 years old in 2 months.
    I still nurse her to sleep and she still wakes to nurse at night too..yes,alot of the time its for comfort (especially if she´s upset or has hurt herself etc),but 95% of the time its because she wants milk.She loves it.I love it that she´s at an age where she can tell me these little things..what it tastes like,how much she loves it etc..these are the amazing little things you have to look forward to all before Kate weans ;)

  3. N says:

    Oh man, the poop is the worst!

  4. Deborah says:

    I definitely cried when I weaned J (at 19 months). For some reason, the thought that he’ll never remember nursing makes me so sad. But honestly, we still cuddle a lot, and cosleep. And when he’s sad or sleepy, he still likes to grab onto my breast like it’s his lovie (which I guess it is). So it’s okay.

  5. Nina says:

    That is hilarious!!

  6. Brandy says:

    We have had a few times of walking into my daughters room to find poo all over the place but that’s because she’s a magician at getting her diaper off at the WRONG time. No fun there at all. LOL.

  7. Schae says:

    lol, never thought i’d say smearing poop is cute, but that’s so cute!!

    i just wanted to say, about the sleep thing. i have a 5.5 month old, and you are my voice of reason regarding sleep. He’s my 2nd child, but you’d think I’d never done the child thing before *blushes*. Anyway, your journey with Kate and sleep is VERY similar to my journey with Tso and sleep. I just remind myself that everything is a phase (the only real knowledge having an older child has left me with). You’re doing great!

  8. Barb says:

    HAHAHAHAHA!

    And as for sleep… you know the answer to that… do what works for you guys. If it’s not working, do what feels right. :) It will get easier. And YES it’s SOOO much personality. I get so pissed at people who think they are God’s gift to parenting because, “I did xyz, and my baby was sleeping through the night at 8 wks old!!” Bullshit I say. (Can you tell this happened today?)